Bride-To-Be Refuses To Indulge Spiteful Sister-In-Law’s Wishes To Join Her Bridal Party, Fiancé Attempts to Guilt Trip Her So She Cracks: ‘She’s just a harsh critic’

Author image for Lana DeGaetano
Lana DeGaetano • "Show me to me please."
Oct 10, 2024 10:00 PM EDT

A bride-to-be must choose her bridesmaids wisely. Typically, they go for their closest friends and/or family because that's a no-brainer. If you're getting married, it's common sense to choose gals who will support you and make your day even more special. Those are the women you want in your corner. Forget about your spiteful, ill-mannered in-laws. It's your day and your choice. Especially when, for example, your future sister-in-law has been awful to you the entire time you've known her.

The woman in this Reddit story explains that her fiancé is adamant about the idea of his sister joining her bridal party. Even though her fiancé is aware of the distasteful, snide comments his sister makes to the woman on a frequent basis, he defends her behavior until the end of the earth. The woman would also have to drop one of her closest friends from the bridal party to make room for her sister-in-law. Obviously, the combination of many factors proves that the woman should not compromise. Even still, her fiancé and his sister are getting more frustrated and mean about the whole situation.

The woman is standing her ground, rightfully so, and is considering canceling the wedding altogether. Keep scrolling to get the juicy full story.

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    Cheezburger Image 10414009088
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    AITA for telling my fiance I won't make his sister a bridesmaid
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    I (27F) and my fiance (30M) are supposed to be getting married in November. He proposed roughly a year ago, we've been planning out the wedding for months and I finally feel as if everything is in order. He last minute brought up
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    that I should include his sister (22F) in the wedding as a bridesmaid. Now I don't dislike his sister but I don't entirely like her either. She came with me to try on dresses due to my fiance's
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    request and she didn't have a good thing to say about any dress I wore. She made comments such as "You should slim down before trying on any dresses" and "If I was my brother I wouldn't
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    want to get married to you looking like that." She's not exactly a positive person I want to be around. I brought this to his attention, and he brushed it off, saying "She's just a harsh critic" and I shouldn't take
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    offense. Now that's only one example, I don't even want to get into what she says on holidays. I told my fiance I don't want to make her a bridesmaid because I already chosen 5 of my close friends and the
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    dresses are already paid for. He said "Simple you could just remove one and add my sister." I stated that they paid out of pocket for their dresses (about 120 each), and it wouldn't be right to just kick one out. He said.
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    I could just pay them and apologize for the inconvenience. I then said bridesmaid are chosen by how close the bride is with them, and it's an honor to be chosen; and I didn't have a spark with his sister at
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    all. He got upset saying why couldn't I just do it for him to make everyone happy but I told him I wouldn't be happy kicking out a close friend for a woman who has done nothing but belittle. me since I met her. And if
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    he wanted to include her in the wedding, she could stand with the groomsmen. He stormed off, and I shouted that I didn't know I was engaged to a child who threw a tantrum when he didn't get what he wanted.
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    That whole situation threw me off, and now I'm questioning if this wedding is even worth it anymore. AITA?
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    . Ipso-P... 2d ago. I'm not having someone in my wedding who treated me that way. Hill to de on.
    via Ipso-Pacto-Facto
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    Recent-Nec... 2d ago. • NTA but if he's this dismissive of her behavior to you, is this really what you want? Does he defend you or stand up in your defense against everyone else? He may be getting some
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    pressure from his parents, but it's the fact he can't even discuss with you without throwing a tantrum. He is a child. If you marry this, this is your life, it will not improve, rarely it does.
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    luella27 2d ago • • Are you sure you want to marry someone who puts your wants and needs last so easily? The option he believes will make "everybody" happy will make you miserable, why are you not part of
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    "everybody" to your own fiancé? This would be a crossroads of the relationship for me, tbh. You could be staring down a life of being further-than-last in your own spouse's mind, that's no life for anybody.
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    Eye Rolling Now • 2d ago . It sounds like all is great as long as you mind him. You are 27. Do you really want to be married so young to someone who has zero maturity and care for your feelings. And you are so logical yet he is a demanding brat.
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    Ginger... • 2d ago. NTA! I'd be canceling this wedding. He's more concerned with his sister's feelings than yours. He brushes off her insults.
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    How would he feel if you told him to drop a friend for your brother or cousin at the last minute? I'd cancel everything and tell him to go live with his sister.
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    Timesu... 2d ago. You offered the perfect compromise. And based on her behavior, I wouldn't put it past her to try to take the attention from you.
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    As others have asked, do you really going to want to spend the rest of your life with someone that doesn't and won't defend you when his sister does that?
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    • Remote_... 2d ago. An obvious side effect of being "a harsh critic" (aka being an unpleasant and nasty person) is that people won't enjoy your company. She's an adult and old enough
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    to live with the natural consequences of her behavior. NTA. If he wants to let her ruin his good time, he can include her in his events.
    via Remote_Bumblebee2240

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